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Mother’s Day Humor: Happy Mother’s Day, Championship Moms

Did you know? Did you know what you were getting yourself into when you first became a mother? One mother has a little Mother’s Day humor in her message to all her fellow moms out there on their special day. Enjoy! Love to all the moms today.

A Message to All Moms on Mothers Day!

Dear Championship Moms:

You know that job you applied for? The one where you are on call basically 24/7? With no task too small or too large?

Where they forgot to tell you that you would be cooking for picky eaters, or maybe washing clothes that are still clean and folded from last week, but somehow ended up back in the hamper? Or that you’d be plunging toilets because—oh never mind; sharing your razor, editing transcribed Wikipedia entries; arguing politics with someone who saw something on Facebook that one time?

That shopping for bathing suits with a teenager is even worse than shopping for bathing suits by yourself? That used athletic gear would smell like … well, there are no words to describe what used athletic gear smells like. Or how about all the crying—crying for their broken hearts, their frustrations, their unbelievably profound and loving epiphanies? Or the laughing—at their spot-on assessments of their parents, the knock-knock jokes, their broken curfew explanations, their outfits?

Did you know that the rush towards you at the end of a preschool day would leave you breathless, as would the sight of them on the field, a stage, a podium, or the driveway on a three-wheeler, a two-wheeler and, finally, a four-wheeler? Well, they don’t tell you all that much before you become a parent, but . . .

Congratulations! YOU GOT THE JOB!

Oh, and did we mention it’s an unpaid internship?

Happy Mother’s Day, to all the moms out there.

Elizabeth Stern

Elizabeth Stern is a mom and writer in Cleveland, Ohio.