When my husband and I purchased a Mac for the first time, our sudden immersion into Macworld reminded me of a six-week trip I once took in Europe: I encountered a new language every time I turned around. Lucky for me, Apple is willing to help the technically challenged by offering a plethora of classes on their various software programs at our local Apple store.
I scanned the online calendar and took note of their many programs: iPhoto, iLife, iTunes, etc. One hour, and I, too, could be a pro at using any of these.
Exhaustive though the list seemed, there were several apps conspicuously absent that could serve this mom of three, and they’re still missing from the conversation. As soon as they become available, Apple can be sure that I will queue up at midnight to purchase the app and queue up again the next night to sign up for the class:
My Wishlist:
1. iLaundress
This software allows me to customize a laundry genie, not wearing the I Dream of Genie outfit (that’s for another article). The genie does the daily laundry exactly how I like it, sorted the way I like it, folded the way I like it and put away, yes, the way I like it. The software can be modified, but “implants” to the various avatars in the software are limited.
2. iOrganize
Another customized genie who works in tandem with the ilaundress. Be careful, as we don’t want competition among the genies. This software automatically launches every day around noon to organize the wreckage from the morning. There are several upgrades to the software, including ipitch for this ipackrat.
3. iSolitude
This software launches automatically each day at 3 p.m. to manage the craziest time of the day. Here’s how it works: A specially-designed mute button can be activated to silence the after-school chaos. Once activated, I, the user, become blissfully calm. The kids can whine, bicker and roll their eyes; yet, I will see and hear nothing.
4. iChef
Another customized genie. Does this need an explanation? If sold out, buy isouschef (chops, washes and marinates) as a next best. In addition to preparing and cooking dinner, this genie coordinates the meals with each child’s post-school activities so that they can eat after swim practice, but before their evening band practice (idreaming).
5. iFone
It’s not what you think. You can run this software in the luxury of your own home without being present. You provide the list of weekly calls—doctors, kennel, schools, community center, handyman, bank, dog trainer, credit card company, library, volunteer list of 100 names, piano teacher, piano tuner, neighbors, fellow carpoolers—and the software maintains the contact list, taking especially good care to keep it updated for your calls next week as well.
6. iWife
This software deserves its own article and come to think of it, monument (like its real counterpart). It can run all programs on your desktop concurrently—iJuggle, iMeeting and iCarpool—but it’s guaranteed not to crash. Unfortunately, there are no more packages available. Apple sold out early in the year, as they didn’t anticipate the demand. Seriously?
If the Apple store pre-packaged its Macs for Moms with all of this software, they would have gotten my business years ago.
